Author Archives: Arcane Cognition

About Arcane Cognition

I write what i see. I write what I know. I write what I feel. I do not write what i think.

EastEnders Rap

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(spoken”Checking the season….make sure it’s not Christmas, because we’re not looking to die….Calling Kat’s Cabs”)

Here we are on the Eastenders Block,
stopping the cab in Walford full stop.
Phil Mitchell, he’s giving you the eye
squaring you up, cause you may be a spy.

Don’t mess with no Mitchell’s I’m telling you first,
Or you wont end up in the rest of this verse.

Oh and now here’s Jack Branning, this dude issa cop,
His brother Max then his daughter, own the car lot.
The Knights and the Carters, it’s a shame about Mick,
have up and decided they’re selling the Vic.

I poured one out, on the corner for Martin,
How dare you guys, that whole plot was rotten.
Then here we are with my fav Kat Slater,
you know she throws hands and asks the questions later
You want to know more about the Slater clan,
Listen to me, you just don’t understand.

and Kim of all the Foxes, and even you Ian Beale,
where would we be if the scene, you didn’t steal?
Freddie, Lauren, Janet, Lily, Amy, and Will,
Avani, Denzel, Barney, Davinder, and Louie Beale.
What will be their stories, what will they hide within?
You’ll have find out next episode, when we all tune in.

(Spoken “See you in Walford… Hey, is that Zack over there? Move over… i can’t see….”)

10/25/2025

It’s just a Building

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it's just a building, i heard you say,
but i remember yesterday.

just a building, when my daddy died,
a room full people sat and cried.

just a building, the day that i lost
all hope and meaning,
i looked up at the cross
i raised my head and hands in prayer,
to the loving God i knew dwelt there.

it's just a building, i heard you say,
but i remember yesterday.

just a building, where my sister wed,
and kinship with fellowship led.

just a building, with flowers of white,
beauty and hope,
a future so bright
i raised my heart and soul in praise,
to the King i know was raised.

it's just a building, i heard you say,
but i remember yesterday.

just a building, where every week,
we learned the truth we did seek.

just a building, where children sang song,
with pride and joy,
how we must get along
and together we all stood and clapped,
we knew our path the Lord has mapped.

it's just a building, i heard you say,
but i remember yesterday.

just a building, where hugs and prayer,
will strengthen everyone led there.

when our numbers were many, our struggles were few,
now our struggles are many, and members are few.
We pray to the Lord to tell us what to do,
and we carry our burdens wishing they knew.
that it's not just a building, 
if they'd just get a clue.

it's just a building, i heard you say,
but i remember yesterday.

just a building, as long as it stands,
we'll hold it together with praying hands.

CAZ 10-15-2025

Mysteries on the Side

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   Come to the Alpine Side, a retirement community with all the amenities amid a nestling forest. All of our cafeteria staff are trained in both culinary and hospitality etiquette, from the people who attend the tables to the person who washes the cutlery. Our chefs create top grade restaurant quality meals that meet and exceed nutrition guidelines. Dietary restrictions are always strictly adhered to while maintaining a meal quality and satisfaction rating of 8.5 even from our most discerning residents.*
   Our activities manager always plans fun and engaging events, outings, and movie/date nights. Many couples who retire here enjoy events like couples cruise weekends. Local bands entertain guests while they dine buffet style, and can also enjoy complimentary couples massages. Different port themed stops, cuisine, and décor add to the excitement and retain enthusiasm for the next trip.
   Perhaps you’re a more cerebral introvert, we have a space built just for you. Our modern library has all the features of a public library because we work in conjunction with their system. Computer cubicles, noise canceling headphones, even a 3-d printer for your grand-kids to play with when they visit. All the modern books as well as well read classics can be found on our shelves. Since we work so closely with the public library system if you need a book we don’t have, simply fill out a request form and it should arrive in four to six weeks. This goes for recordings, news articles, even old movies and television shows. Imagine having a whole world of information and entertainment right outside your front door!
   With the many clubs that meet on the premises you are sure to find one on a hobby you already enjoy, or learn a new one to be passionate about. With different clubs meeting every day, you are sure to find something fulfilling to do every day you are here. With all the endless possibilities and friendships you can make, Alpine Side residents have a happiness rating of 9.8 among it’s residents.*
   Our gymnasium may be small by industry standards, but the equipment is maintained daily and does not have a lot of fancy settings to confuse you with. We offer an indoor swimming pool that is only four feet deep to reduce drowning. There is no active lifeguard on duty daily but, if reserved two weeks in advance for a small pool party we will hire a temporary life guard at no charge to the resident.
   Located adjacent to the property is our sister property Meadow Side offering 24 hour assisted living and hospice care, and Devine Care Hospital.
   Our seniors can rely on expert medical care at the local North West branch of Devine Care rated best in care by the CRP (Coalition of Retired Persons) five years in a row. Located nearby is also Interstate Fifty Two for quick travel to East Holdian and Leargate Mall.
   Boasting fourteen floors and scenic views from every corner. Inviting Dining Rooms, welcoming spaces, and smiling helpful staff are sprinkled through every corner of the Alpine Side. Come find your new niche while enjoying the next chapter of your life, make new friends and embark on new adventures, all the while still enjoying the best comforts from your home. Come find out why so many seniors say, “Oh, I went to the Alpine Side, it’s the only way to stay.”

*Residents polled for information annually

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Fantasmal

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   “Is it on?”
   Darkness was all he saw, silence was all he heard.
   “Is it on?” he asked again.
   A small particle of light could be seen in the distance, there was a “bzzrp” electrical sound. Suddenly light and color filled the air a second before an immersion of sound.
   “It works! It works!” he shouted excitedly as he looked around at his new surroundings. Huntington Park was alive with life. Birds sang in trees, people walked past him. Food vendors called out looking for hungry patrons.
   He rushed to the hot dog vendor and ordered a hot dog with everything on it. When the food was handed to him he took a big bite expecting to taste the sweetness of ketchup, tart of mustard, and savory of a roasted weenie.
   Daniel’s delight faded as he tasted nothing in his mouth. He tossed the meal into a nearby garbage can.
   He set his mind on the path that winded through the park. A sign in front of him seemed to glow instantly. He walked toward it and read the writing, “Park Trail 6”. Glancing to his right he saw the path he was looking for. His joy returned to him as he started jogging down the path.
   Roller skaters whizzed past him, people on bicycles rode past. Some waved, others were more interested in where they were going than who was on the path.
   Soon he reached the sprawling lake that was at the center of Huntington Park. There was a rental booth, decked out in yellow aluminum siding. You could rent paddle boats, fishing equipment, and storage lockers, among other things. He watched a man teaching a boy how to fish at the bank of the water. Far in the distance he could see a young couple in a paddle boat doing circles as fast as they could. Probably trying to create a current, or waves, or some other nonsense.
   “It’s nice isn’t it?” a voice next to him asked.
   Daniel was quite shaken by the experience as he looked over to see who had snuck up unexpectedly.
   It was a teenage male, dressed in a logo t-shirt and jeans. He smiled at Daniel causing his monolid eyes make creases in his bronze skin.
   “It really is the Utopia they market it to be.” he waved his bronze hand around.
   Daniel said nothing and glanced again at the man teaching the boy to fish.
   “Well if you get bored in here, my name is Austin Greeves.” the teenager offered out his hand. “You can find me any time.”
   “Don’t you sleep?”
   Austin laughed and then walked away. He tossed his skateboard to the ground and skated off in the opposite direction.
   Daniel hadn’t notice the skateboard earlier. Maybe he just wasn’t paying attention.
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Pathway to Destiny

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    The crowd screamed and pushed against the line of soldiers with glazed over eyes. The soldiers were keeping a small semi circle of dirt clear in front of a platform that stood about four feet from the ground. On the platform three people surrounded by soldiers sat in chairs. Mark sat in a chair in front, Casandra and Dybin sat in chairs behind and to either side of his. Mark Chasarue sat disinterested watching the spectacle.
    A man with black matted hair was brought out in metal chains. He was dirty and malnourished from being in the prison cell for a month. The robe he was wearing was white when he first arrived in his cell but now was a reddish brown.
    Larso Denkan looked into the cold gray eyes of the blonde man on the platform. He knew he would find no mercy in them, they were as cold as the steel they resembled. His recent decisions began to flash into his mind, the reason he was here. The chain of events that had led to this.
    Things had been bad in Toolay for a long time. There was no work, there was no law, there was no help of any kind. Rumors were spreading of this new world, a land of plenty. People there had lots of space to move freely about, there was plenty of food to eat, and soldiers to protect them from those who mean harm. It was a dream come true to Larso who had to fight for everything his whole life. So he rushed to the most beautiful woman in the village, Mara, whom he had loved since he first met. He asked her to join him in the new world, he promised her she would never have to struggle again. They married quickly and fled together in a boat and arrived with thousands of others to this new promise land.
    When they arrived it was not as he had hoped. Too many other migrants had arrived with his same dream, and with them bandits and outlaws looking to fleece the new world. They had no place to live, and no work to go to. Mara became bitter and resentful towards him, at least back in Toolay she had land to farm for food. She was with child when they arrived in the new land, and had given birth to a beautiful baby girl. A baby girl who cried day and night, and would not be comforted. A baby that cried like all the babies cried in the migrant encampment. It cried because it lacked safety and security, warmth and food. The baby never stopped crying.
    Larso couldn’t take it anymore. Everyday he went with a hundred others to the square and looked for work, but there was never any. He begged alongside the widowed and orphaned for money or scraps of food. Mara, who was once the most beautiful woman in the village was starting to look more like an old shrew. His heart broke, his spirit broke. He saw the sellers in the square, the baker, butcher, fish merchant, all of them doing well while he starved and lost everything. The resentment and jealousy began to stir deep within him til he decided to strike out.
    He took a loaf from the baker, but the baker came after him with a knife. Larso wrestled the knife away and stabbed the baker, killing him. Then he took what money the baker had on him, and the bread he stole, and ran back to Mara. Mara screamed when she saw the blood, he was a monster to her. She fled with the child into the migrant encampment, he never saw her again. Two days later the soldiers arrested him. All he could think of was Mara’s beautiful face, twisted in a scream of horror as she clutched their child close her. He missed them so badly every part of him was filled with sorrow, at least they were not here now to witness this.
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The Game

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     It was dark, in the immediate distance. A bright white light illuminated overhead, I could feel it’s heat like a naked bulb. In front of me was a small round card table, the top covered in green felt, the stem made of polished dark cherry wood.
     I reached out and glanced at my hand. Perfectly oval, bright red nails extended from long, slender fingers. Fingers that reached out like spider legs from a open ended, ruffled trimmed fingerless glove. The glove itself was some sort of dark grey denim, with a machine sewn seam perfectly centered on the back of my hand. A white ruffled eyelet lace protruded from the top, and the wrist. I turned my hand over to glance at the palm. The ruffled lace was machine sewn into a white cotton liner on either end. The grey denim had dark grommets, with a black satin ribbon crisscrossing over the liner. It was tied in a neat bow near my heart line.
     My black hair fell to the side of my face into my peripheral vision, it was cut short just below the ears. The hair fell straight yet looked like humidity had caused minor frizz.
     I glanced down at the corseted top I wore. It matched my gloves with the exception of the midriff part made of black leather. The dark gray denim fit tight and kept my posture straight and perfect. I could feel the bottom of it near the sacral chakra and the top just above the heart chakra. The white shirt came up over my cleavage and covered it, white ruffled eyelet lace trimmed it almost like a ViVi collar. The sleeves ran down my arm and reached just to the inside of the gloves, but they were cuffed with a single white plastic button.
     Then a light came on across the room and to the left. There sat a man behind a table identical to mine. He had a thin oval face, his cheeks slightly sunk in giving him a ghoulish, ghastly aura. Smooth, thin white hair fell limp and lifeless under a black top hat sporting a light grey band. A thin long scarlet feather behind a single normal sized playing card, you could only see the blue designed back of, were tucked into the band on the left side.
     He wore what looked like a black formal dinner jacket, over a light gray vest with black buttons. His white undershirt bore the same eyelet lace as mine, only his sat high upon his neck. I tried to see his eyes, but they were shadowed by the brim of his hat. He wore black leather gloves, though they only extended past his long bony knuckles so only a third of his fingers actually showed.
     There was no background, there was no floor or ceiling. There was nothing but darkness, and the two of us.
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Because I Have To Let You Go

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It’s so quiet here since I made the choice,
it seems so strange without the chaos,
the silence no longer echos your voice,
or the fighting and anger among us.

I wonder what I am to do with my time,
The empty hours stretch to fill,
So lost and alone yet everything in line,
if my strength can uphold my will.

I will not miss your phantom touch,
nor your imaginary embrace,
not the romantic words you use so much,
to try to keep me chaste.

I wonder what I am to do with my time,
I look at my unfulfilled life,
So lost and alone yet everything in line,
knowing I’m not your wife.

I struggle now with a war in my soul,
to end this unhealthy relationship,
I pray I have the strength to let you go,
so I may see the end of this.

I wonder what I am to do with my time,
The empty hours stretch to fill,
So lost and alone yet everything in line,
if my strength can uphold my will.

6-5-2015

The Fight

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You’ve been here too long, this life is a bore,
You make the very art of living a bore droning chore.
We’ve done everything together, nothing here can be New,
we’ve explored every nook and cranny, there’s nothing left to do.

then the fight starts, because i start to see
something that is not you, something that is Me.
you can’t let me escape, even though you despise,
all of my hatred, and all of my lies.

The first strike, seduction, oh what i am worth,
How you worship the wonderful day of my birth.
Everything i am, everything i do,
holds a special meaning to you.

but i prevail, to tell my tale…

Your second strike is much more deep and detailed,
into my mind you will seep, my train you’ll derail.
you’ll fracture my thoughts and reality,
and make me question my sanity.

lest i should prevail, to tell my solemn tale…

My ground is unstable, the horizon is gone,
i have only the memory of it to carry on.
You feel justified as i watch you smile,
to get it back will take me a while.

while you prevail, to tell your tale…

of how we were always meant to be,
how can i be so blind not to see?
who can Love then turn their back,
and not expect this big attack?

But i am not moved, i tire of this song,
we’ve been at this party for far too long.
and now i want something different, something new,
now i want something that is not me and you.

5-4-2015

My name is “Alone”

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I woke up in my bed today, to the ticking of the clock,
the silence here screams loud as words, the day is going to start.
“Alone” my name is branded on everything I do,
every single day here there’s a Me but not a You.
Alone I bathe, I eat, I sleep,
I drive to work, alone I think.
At lunch there is a table of one, waiting patiently for me
I feel them passing by and staring, at the animal that is Me.
I live out my sentence in Solitary without parole,
in a land with no governor to pardon for my soul.
Alone I walk, I sit, I dream,
alone I do, do everything.
In the evening I return, to the darkness and silence,
to sit alone and contemplate, why did I try this.
“Alone” my name is branded on everything I do,
I live everyday where there’s a Me but not a You.
11-18-2011

Attackers

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I know she holds within her, your very fragile soul.
Your heart, your mind would not exist if she lost control.
I do really love you, though in those nightmare days gone past,
You tried your best to kill me, to be the lone one in the cast.
My heart, my soul, my love, my life, I am your everything,
Without the breath within my lungs never again will you sing.

Now I watch your storm as you muster to survive,
I know my broken body isn’t up for this ride.
You smile as my attackers number four and five,
That I will be too weak and have to keep you alive.

I know she holds within her, all your dreams and hope,
Without her constant approval there’s no way for you to cope.
I do really love you, but in the hellish dreams you cast,
You tortured me to no end and sacrificed my past.
My beauty, my hair, my quick thinking wit,
Without my heartbeat there will be no more of it.

Now I watch your storm as you muster to survive,
I know my broken body isn’t up for this ride.
You smile as my attackers number four and five,
That I will be too weak and have to keep you alive.

I know she holds within her, all you despise and hate,
Without her attention your whole life would dissipate.
I do really love you, though every time I try to dream,
You preach to me of Mine until you make me scream.
My steadfast reserve, my humor, and my will,
Without my thoughts, it’s you I intend to kill.

Now I watch your storm as you muster to survive,
I know my broken body isn’t up for this ride.
You smile as my attackers number four and five,
I will never be so weak that I have to keep you alive.

1-18-2011